We are so excited to bring you yet another thought-provoking and insightful blog from our amazing parter, Thomas Mc Cormack, also know as The Millennial Coach
In this blog, Thomas has given us a way to figure out for ourselves the things we can do less of, in order to help ease anxiety. He shows us how talking through things with someone else can help us come up with solutions, raise awareness – and more than likely realise that we may have more in common with people than we initially realise or expect.
We think you will really benefit from this one!
The Game of Less
Over the past few months the world, and most of our lives have been turned upside down in some way or another. Been told to stay in, being kept away from everything that makes life enjoyable, entertaining and engaging. Interacting with others, being out and about and getting somewhere.
In a fairly short period of time, most of us were reminded of what it was like to be grounded by your parents when you were younger. Be told that you couldn’t do things you wanted to do. You couldn’t see the people you wanted to see. You couldn’t just sneak off to the cinema or to some old field with the gang like you did when you were younger, suppin’ away from Ballygowan’s finest water bottles…
This time, we were all grounded. As the T&C’s of our communal grounding have shifted and changed as time has gone on, there is something still hanging in the air. It is felt no matter where you go. Just hanging there in the air…a feeling of uncertainty mixed with a sense of hope and a drop of “someone wake us up and tell us all we were just in a very sophisticated version of “The Truman Show””.
As someone who is lucky enough to have conversations with people all of the time who want to take a step back from the day to day to reframe and rethink where they are going, it appeared to me like many people were forced to take a step back. It can be a scary place to be if it’s not something you planned on doing for yourself.
What I have found most interesting, is that most people have come to realise what they can do with LESS OF, as opposed to what they need to do MORE OF.
Does this resonate for you?
See do any of these make sense for you and what you may have come to realise over the past few months.
Over the past few months have you become aware that if you done less of:
Spending time with certain people because you felt you “had to”, you “should”, or you’re “expected to”
Taking part in certain social activities because you felt you “had to”, you “should”, or you’re “expected to”
Spending a lot of time on social media and apps that add little or no value to your life
Spending a lot of time thinking about all the things you dream of doing, or want to do
…you would probably feel better, have more free time, be more content in yourself and have time to do the things that you really want to do?
The Game of Less
There is nothing like a one on one conversation to get really clear on what your reality is like, and what difference the smallest of tweaks and changes could make to the quality of your life.
If you’re still with me to this point, this is a suggestion that may hold some value for you.
Who can you have honest conversations with, who don’t judge or try and make you see things how they see things?
Who would you feel comfortable talking to, with the purpose of getting a little clearer and feeling a little more accountable to making some small but potentially impactful adjustments?
If you have thought of someone, hold their name in your head for a second.
I’m going to suggest contacting this person and see would they be open to having a two way conversation of “The Game of Less”.
This is a conversation where you talk through a few small questions – and let the questions flow in both directions.
Q. What would greatly benefit me to do less of going forward?
Q. What time would that create for me?
Q. What difference would that make to my energy levels?
Q. What difference would that make to my headspace?
Q. What difference would these changes make for me over a longer period of time?
If you take the time to talk it through with someone who will listen, someone who will also benefit and gain from the conversations – it could prove to be quite a fruitful conversation for both of you.
To really make the conversation hold value, try and finish up with one take away that both of you will commit to doing less of, and how you will hold each other accountable to it! Becoming more aware of something is great – but without any action to create some change it’s like listening to that friend who always says they’ll do something and spends so much time talking about it, they forget to actually go and do it.
Having a two way conversation like this holds so much more value beyond the art of conversation and asking questions. It’s bringing basic human needs into play in a meaningful way for the benefit of both.
Being heard, being seen and feeling valued.
What other questions could you use as a catalyst for meaningful conversation?